Jolting up. My eyes are wide. Was it a dream I was having or am I really...where we are? The bus pitches back and forth. Ice pops and snaps beneath the weight of the bus. The bus jerks forward tires catching some traction, twisting across the ice. The engine whines but the sound of rubber slipping and scraping across the ice drown the sound out. The driver shifts down and the bus floats for a moment. He is hell bent. I must have been asleep. It's hard to tell at the moment. Colin and I have been traveling now about forty eight hours and I thought I was still on the train to Urumqi. Forty eight hours ago we were boarding a train in Wuxi. Colin worries that the train ride will be very hard for me because I only had a standing room only ticket and Colin had a seat. In retrospect, I now know what he is talking about but didn't understand the consequences of his words. I do now. This time though I left it up to the higher powers to do the right thing and they came up with a compromise. I told Colin before we left that everything will work out the way it needs to. There has to be something said for blissful ignorance. Sometimes you just get lucky. We were hoping for a chance to talk to one of the conductors about upgrading to a sleeper berth so that I could ride the trip out in relative style. Colins worries about me subside for a moment as we are standing on the platform and our car pulls up. Sleepers! Oh how serendipitous! We climb aboard and realize they are using the sleepers as seats and standing room stills applies. People pour on the train like ants to the colony. We get to our berth and Colin tells me to sit. So I sit. The car fills up. People are standing. I think that ought to be me. The train conductor comes by to check tickets and as she examines mine, Colin explains I am his foreign language teacher on my way with him to visit his family for the holidays and asks her to allow me to sit with him. She looks at me, at Colin, hands my ticket back to me and leaves. I climb into the corner of the bottom bunk and relax. Six more people show up and sit with us five women and another man. Our baggage is stored up and under anywhere there is space because during the holidays everyone leaves for extended periods of time and bring with them a lot of luggage. Luggage space is a premium. Anywhere out of the aisle is fair game. I think about that now, much, much later as our bus threatens to careen out of control on a mountain pass three hours outside of Urumqi. I think, how spacious those bunks are now compared to my current lot. Trapped on the top bunk at the back of a sleeper bus. Alice is having a nightmare in Wonderland. Three rows of beds stacked two high, with the top bunks less than half a meter from the top. To get to the top bunk, I had to jump in a prone position. The isles were less than a shoulders width so you had to walk sideways. Tight would be a polite term. The bed is a wood plank with a thin layer of cotton batting covering with a cotton comforter to curl up in, mummy style. The beds are just shy of being long enough for comfort. I stuck my camera bag underneath my knees so that I could fit my feet into the a hole that the top serves as a pillow for the person in front of me. Lying flat is the only option though the bed is shoulder width shy. I stick out over my accommodations. The bed rail drives into my side every time the bus bounces, which is often. No, I am not on the train now. I thought I was. I keep drifting in and out of real time. No, I am on a bus. Exhaustion keeps me from panicking. I am trapped. I am, trapped! I am cornered and no way to escape. Breathe... breathe. I think the roof is closing in on me. The bus is shrinking! I turn my head and peer out the window encased with ice on the inside. Outside, a deep night blue sky caresses snow cover upon the mountain peak. Stars are shining. The wind gently whips snow dust up around us. Snap! pop! The engine screams, grinding gears. It's very cold. The bus continues it's crazy dance across the pass. Ten hours to go. Our destination, Yining, on the Ili River. I go back to dreaming. Sometimes, you do get lucky.